Unwanted Change

I am my own worst enemy

Years go by and she gets stronger every second

My skin splits, tearing me apart as my flesh stretches

I was afraid of who I was and not who I used to be

I am a piece of an unfinished puzzle

My shape, my background, my individuality varies

Whether I have three sides, dark color, or a piece of the bigger picture

It depends on where I think I belong

You’re not popular enough

You’re not cool enough

You’re not skinny enough

Well I’ve had enough of this stuff

Because I know that I am good enough

it took me awhile to figure that out you see,

I liked the likes on instagram

I followed the followers that I found myself following

For the fame...the friends

A little more make-up they said

Show more skin, Use the right caption, that’s not enough likes they said

I was fed up with all the comments and judgement

And lead my head to thinking I needed to change

For society to accept me for what I truly am not

Completely lost in this neverending cyclone

My body is no longer mine

I’ve changed so much and for what?

To have more friends?

To be seen as popular?

I wonder if it all was worth it…

All my time and energy spent

Trying to fit these pieces together that obviously do not match

I look in the mirror and I see a familiar face

Of course that face is not mine

It’s the face of my friend

The one that made me change

It is the eyes of all those that watched me die

It is the creation of society that I see

I need to rip that person apart

I need to restart this puzzle

I need to take this constant pain and

Push the pressure out that’s painted

My personality to portray a person that I know is not me

Let myself be

Sew the skin back together

Mend what I have destroyed

Let me be free

Fugitive or Key Figures?

There was never a point in history that didn’t involve any sort of revolts or disobedience resulting in blood or anarchy. Conformity to society and letting the government control every aspect of life was common and many people let that lifestyle continue without complaints. Philosophers such as Thoreau, Emerson, and Paine demonstrated those ideas in their major writing pieces explaining their ideas. Very few people from those times followed the ideals that the writers represented. Figures like Elizabeth Cady Stanton, John Brown, and even the Sons of Liberty all had one thing in common and that was their bravery and courage to make a bold statement and being proactive in what they believe is right.

During the era 1846-1854, there was extreme political tension occurring in the nation which kept America in a tense state. To try and fight against the government was risky and could lead to more turmoil, but one women did not let that get in her way. The fight for women’s suffrage just started to spark during this time and many women in America had something to say. Elizabeth Staton was the voice and leader to the meeting filled with women at Seneca Falls, New York. For one woman to decide to hold a public meeting about how the government is unfair and unjust is exactly what Emerson and Thoreau would have wanted. Not letting the norm of society denote women of their true potential was seen as rebellious when in reality it was just an act of self-expression. As Emerson has wrote, “What I must do is all that concerns me, not what the people think” (Self-Reliance by Ralph Waldo Emerson). Staton was not into women’s suffrage for the fame or for the pure adrenaline of being rebellious, but for her own pleasure to state what she feels and gather up the women to feel empowered. Whether he/she fights for a cause with a group of people or by one’s self, civil disobedience has to start with one human; one courageous mind.

Nearing the end of the 19th century, the Civil War broke out across America and one of the main reasons for the cause of that war was slavery (John Green). As this unit has been titled, our nation was in a continuous dispute as centuries have passed. A division between the north and the south, slave versus on-slave state, created skeptics and disbelievers in the governmental system. Strong abolition advocates, such as John Brown, took drastic matters into his own hands that made him seem like psycho. Brown was daring and borderline insane when he decided to turn to violence to make a point. John Brown literally took out the competition, per say, when he murdered in cold blood innocent slave owners and townspeople of a slave town (VA Historical Society). Besides the fact that it involved killing citizens and raiding a city, his intentions were true and just. In his speech, he stated that, “...I never had the design against the life of any person...or to excite slaves to rebel” (Brown Speech). John Brown clearly did not care whether a group would support his actions and join him because he did this for his own state of mind to try and make something that he believed was wrong to right. One of his supporters included Thoreau. 

Henry David Thoreau was a supporter of John Brown and what he did because just the plain fact that he did something about what he believed in. Since our core has studied Mr. Thoreau in such depth these past few months, I know that he and Ralph Emerson are the epitomes of civil disobedience. Henry Thoreau was also an activist against the government at the time and he “held deeply felt political views, opposing slavery and the Mexican-American War”(Biography). With both being antislavery activists, it proves perfectly why Thoreau would admire John’s actions. The act against the government is simply not something most people would go around doing because it could lead to their imprisonment or in John’s case, death. Instead of seeing his actions as defiant and consider it murder, Thoreau views it as heroic and brave, especially since it is for a group of people and not just himself.

The majority of people in America stood and allowed their lives to be dictated and controlled by society and the government whether just or unjust. Fear of consequences and judgement coated people’s minds, preventing any sort of rebellion in what they believe. The handful of so-called “rebels” paid the price of speaking their mind, but the result of their bravery shaped our world today. Thoreau and Emerson set the base or foundation that the people of the 19th and 20th century built off of and took their writing and applied it to their lives.

"Henry David Thoreau - Philosopher, Journalist, Poet ..." 2011. 16 Nov. 2015 <http://www.biography.com/people/henry-david-thoreau-9506784> (Biography)

Bloody Battle

In response to The Fields of Monterey by Marion Dix Sullivan

The Battle of Monterey was a bitter-sweet victory. The Americans fought against the Mexicans at the brink of war fighting for land. Troops were sent down to Monterey to defend and fight against the Mexicans, which ended in American victory but then into a negotiation between the two countries trade the city for armistice. The battle was won, but ended in losing the city technically making the soldier's’ death for nothing. The emotions of victory and tragedy is perfectly shown in Sullivan’s poem, The Field of Monterey.

This poem was gave extremely good imagery and metaphors explaining the Battle of Monterey. Sullivan was perfectly able to squeeze all the emotions and moods of what time was like before, during, and after the war through descriptions of the seasons, “when spring was here” and when “the flowers of spring have faded” (Sullivan). The visual descriptions of the flowers and even the fruits painted an image of vibrant colors like the flushing of cheeks to bright red and the gold that papayas turn to when perfectly ripe set a tone of perfection, but the lines surrounding the beauty is deathly and dark. The poems transitions from rejoicing to mourning in a perfect three stanza poem.

The way Sullivan set the poem up was also very strategic and organized to embody the emotions felt during the battle. The repetition that Sullivan used for the line, “...in death are sleeping, on the the field of Monterey” (Sullivan) is both beautiful and tragic. The use of the word sleeping gives the idea of the soldiers lying dead on the field a more gentle tone, yet it creates the sense of sadness since they lie dead on the field of battle. Also, the transitions that Sullivan had from one stanza to another was not abrupt but subtle and smooth. Comparing the first stanza to the second, she was able to use the line, “...many hearts are bleeding, upon this glorious day” (Sullivan), both figuratively and literally giving the line two different tones. The poem brings out both the bright and dark side of the battle that day and expresses Sullivan’s view of the battle.

Sullivan was able to see the post-battle from two different perspectives, and from this poem, I believe that she was not a total fan of the battle. She explained how lively life was prior to the battle and how she “was crowned the queen” (Sullivan) before the time of the battle and that describes her emotions of pride and content before America even declared war on Mexico. She despises the fact that many died that day and the Battle of Monterey left a large indent on the hearts of family members of the loved soldiers.

The Power of 42

Jackie Robinson Back in the day Of the USA The world was separated, by a colored hate The All-American sport was the place to start A revolutionary change in every colored heart Listen, Jackie Robinson He started a movement Against the hate of the darker skin Branch Rickey said “Man you should play for Major League” But the world wasn’t ready Could’ve had a World War 3 He was the spark of civil rights Influenced figures like MLK and  Rosa Parks He’s brave and strong Took the hate but didn’t fall Accepted or not, all he wanted to do was play baseball At one point he said something that was very wise “A life is not important except in the impact it has on other lives” Integrate this world of hate it’s great to know I made it to home plate...wait Chorus: Robinson The All-American He stood for all the Africans Robinson Changed the minds of whites Every race needs equal rights He made a great impact On society And the army Not many agreed With the Dodger’s new team Abuse and threats Thrown at Jackie by every single white audience They couldn’t see Past the color of his skin he’s just a wannabe Though their hatred at first started off pretty strong America realized later that they were really wrong Blacks on the other hand they were gaining confidence Robinson paved the way starting the Civil Rights Movement Outside of playing ball He made his house into a music hall It was no jazz club there weren’t any slaves there The colored skin were free but the whites never played fair Every game that he played he was he would pray for  the strength to fight on keep hate out of the way KKK in the south were the most racist Can’t the USA prevent this? A nation built from oppression, yet there was no acceptance for them He broke the color barrier he got respect from them “Leaders of the Free World” yea, that ain’t true Jackie changed the world, the minds, the people you know he came through Chorus: Robinson Though he had dark skin He brought the Dodgers to a win He had a huge breakthrough With the number 42 Remember 42 Remember 42 Legendary 42

America At Its Worst

In response to the Vietnam Veterans Against War Statement by John Kerry

After reading this speech, experiencing this speech, I realized how ugly America’s past truly is. The men and women of our country that serve under our nation are known as our heroes of war and are praised for their service, but what we didn’t know was truly went on during the war.

The speech that John Kerry gave during the time of the Vietnam War was bold, powerful, and was able to let the world see the war on behalf of the soldiers...or in this case the suicide squad. What I mean by suicide squad is that a group of men were placed on foreign country to do the dirty work of a greater power but die in the process of doing so. There's two words that explain the reasoning of it all: stop communism.

The communist government was spreading through the Asian countries and America wanted to contain it. Unfortunately, the lives of our soldiers were put on the spot. Millions of people were affected by this war, American or not. Whether dead, missing, kidnapped, or even alive, the soldiers that witnessed the cruelty of what went on in Vietnam are in some way scarred.

Closure For The Mind and Soul

In response to the chapter, Field Trip in The Things They Carried by Tim O’Brien

The shit fields and what happened in there was a tragic death of one character, Kiowa. The place of his death was very influential to a lot of the characters because Kiowa’s character was truly genuine compared to the others. Tim and Kiowa’s relationship was never really prominent besides in the chapter The Man I Killed. So, Tim visiting the place of his death was very unusual, but made sense in the end.

Memories and forgiveness were a couple of the main themes in the chapter Field Trip. As Tim goes back to Vietnam with his daughter he was able to reflect and take in all that occurred in the field. He didn’t, however, bring his daughter there just to visit a third world country or to see the place he fought in the war but I believe it was for his own sake. He needed to find closure and a sense of peace and the only way that he was able to do that was to see where so many men were sucked into the war and metaphorically died. His daughter was like his roots and safety net that kept his mind from sinking back into the shit fields. I see it as if going back to that place would suck him back into that “war-like” state of mind and his daughter being there with him is keeping him from losing himself to the war...the shit fields. As Tim buries the moccasins of Kiowa, he's burying that soldier in Vietnam. He’s releasing that life and moving forward from it all. One constant factor that was present not only in this chapter but also several chapters before that is the presence of water.

The element of water stands for several things like purity, rejuvenation, and even healing. In this novel, water is one of the many natural enemies. The rain in the forest, the diseased filled waters, and the murky watered shitfield all have played roles in the deaths of more than one soldier. So, as Tim enters the water after the war when it is all over, it’s as if he is accepting defeat. Tim is giving back to the water what it has rightfully taken and won against him and his men.

Empty Hunger

 

In response to Allen Ginsberg’s photo

Lavish, luxuries, leaping off the plates

Rolling around on the table

Like there is nothing holding them back

Freedom to roam and feel

The taste of cold porcelain plates

Fragile and strong shattering at our feet

The caress of our tongues lapping the juices

Pouring from the fruit, slowly trickling down our faces

We taste gold of the purest kind

Our taste buds frazzled by the punch

Flicking around in our mouths uncontrollably begging for more

Our bodies frozen in the essence of time; no change

We crave so much and take so little

We gain no strength but our minds counteract that feeling weak

Feast! Feast! Feast!

Eat to the day’s desire with comrades around

I look around...alone

Lavish luxuries, fill the plate

But an empty table for one